Kabadtripan

1) Sam Milby’s smile or his approximation thereof.
2) Foreigners acting like they own my country and countrymen who make them feel that way.
3) People airing their misfortunes and blaming it all on the President as though she is solely responsible for that feature of existence called life.
4) Evangelists who practically say you will go to hell assh0le if you don’t join them.
5) MRT/LRT Escalators that won’t work and those able-bodied beggars at the foot of the stairs.
6) Noontime shows whose hosts scream in pretended joy, and goad their contestants to reveal their darkest sorrows squeezing every bit of a tear for the public to see.
7) Sappy and self-important commercials.
8) Local brands of that stuff they call corned beef.
9) Cabbies that reason out - once they open their mouths, you are bound to hear something that will ruin your day.
10) That mountain at the corner of my room called laundry.
11) Friends’ parents who assume that you’re the keeper of their child when out of sight.
12) Call center dweebs in their fake subtlety in assuring everybody that they do work for a call center.
13) Nursing students assuring everybody that they do know the medical field.
14) People who assert their intelligence by quoting (and misquoting) textbook.
15) Loudmouthed moviegoers and those who’d rather text than understand a plot.
16) Hollywood flicks that are more like loud music videos or video games.
17) Novelty songs as muzak in PUVs and malls and restaurants but thankfully are diminishing in airplay.
18) Karaoke patrons who understand singing as a style of reading in various forms of loudness.
19) Aired singing competitions whose contestants can’t sing.
20) Has-beens staging concerts in the P.I. (a marketing strategy I know but it just makes them look like malcontent suckers).
21) Rock bands who insist that rock is all about shouting.
22) Boy bands who call their music non-pop and respectable.
23) Girls who believe they’re cool because they smoke.
24) Guys who believe they’re cool because they drive.
25) Girls who think they’re gorgeous because they have boyfriends, vice versa.
26) Girls who pretend they’re drunk then ask favors and losers who proudly oblige.
27) Girls who think they’re sexy because they drink tequila.
28) Guys who think they’re “the man” because they drink, period.
29) The terrible price of beer in better bars and restos.
30) People with MP3 players who wear their little gadgets like jewelry.
31) Nokia for giving the market a headache about whatmodelthis and whatmodelthat toys (they don’t look like cellphones to me).
32) Forwarded messages that flood the inbox with jokes that aren’t in the least bit funny.
33) Forwarded messages that fcuking promise the worse if not forwarded more.
34) MS Word’s grammar checker, which insists that my spelling is wrong and underlines most of the above items for correction unless they are bulleted.