In Perspective

Reading the article below put my loss in a different perspective. It might have been my fault that I put my new cellphone in my backpak where it could easily slip out of the pocket without me noticing, and took the bus because I was too impatient to wait for a cab. I was already running late. I cried over it, I'm not over it yet, I'm done with being sad, now I'm just burning in outrage.
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You explode. You feel like crushing the world with your bare hands. Of course, you never realize that you’re an earthling and could get crushed along with the planet.

I am not an environmentalist but I love the planet. I would never attempt to do anything that would bring about its demise. I live here. And I’ll stay on. I’ve had more than my share of troubles and I’m still alive. Splash acid on my face, transform me into a tortured mythical character like Sisyphus, sentence me to reclusion perpetua - I’ll still be here and with smug optimism. Escape is possible. For some people, it’s inevitable especially in a country like ours. Pull some strings and you’re free again. Life is the best thing ever. You have no business taking it for granted. The point is, as long as you’re alive, there is something out there. You’ve got a problem? Sleep it over. Let the demons haunt you through the night. After all, tomorrow is just another day. The sun rises. Live it up.

Think selfishly. Think of yourself. Take care of yourself because essentially, there’s nobody else to pull you through. In the unlikely situation that someone abnormally selfless comes to the rescue, don’t hold your breath. It will depend on whether or not the help will actually work on you. And sometimes people are better off alone. It takes away some of the glory in making it through. Survive if you can and let that step up your worth and not owe it to someone else.

Do not depend on others and do not depend on God. He has too much trouble in his hands already, what with all the praying going on in places where your problem doesn’t mean anything at all. There’s a war out there. There’s drought and famine. There’s a whole community where only a few are spared of AIDS. There’s too much suffering in this world that God won’t even notice you. Just ask: Among billions of people, most of whom in distress, what makes your benign existence so especial that the boundless universe and God in his infinite glory should pay attention? Is there a God?

Do not say the deep sh!t you’re in is a part of God’s master plan, or that the Devil pushed you into that pit. That’s a shameless, cowardly excuse. And so is Psychology. It continues to come up with terminologies to explain aberrant behavior, which makes you less of a culprit. Oh, that was due to my excessive-compulsive disorder, or it was my alter ego, or I’m sorry if my being a nymphomaniac is making you uncomfortable. Just about every other thing that leads to something unpleasant has a psychological explanation that could extricate you conveniently. If you can’t find the correct term, simply abuse further the most abused defense of all time and state the obvious: I’m only human. You might as well say you’re a bacterium. The bottom line is, you did something wrong. You fcuked up. Whether or not it was intentional, it happened because you caused it to happen. The Law of Causality was still working last time I checked. Face the consequences. You’re responsible so shut up.
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Originally written in March 2000 | taken from my Essay Portfolio